It’s normal to feel anxious at certain focuses in your life, and it’s human instinct to long for the need to enhance yourself, your circumstance and your relationships. With regards to relationships, there will dependably be a rhythmic movement. Anxiety is typical. The craving to need to change and enhance your relationship is ordinary. Yet, you have to know yourself well so as to roll out the right improvements at the right times.
Where you are in terms of your personal growth effects every aspect of your relationship. If you haven’t developed yourself sufficiently, you can hardly navigate a long-term relationship without major issues such as doubt, fear and restlessness. Without personal development, you cannot know yourself well enough to know what you need, what you can give, what you are looking for and what you are willing to do to obtain it.
If a lack of life experience or internal work exists in either one of you, there isn’t much you can do to correct this short of deciding you truly want to mature and are willing to push and challenge yourself (and each other) to get there. This includes owning up to short-comings and working on bettering yourself as a person and a partner. However, accomplishing these goals requires patience, understanding and commitment. You’re going to feel restlessness throughout this process.
This oft over-used word actually holds deep meaning. Committing your time, your heart and your life to someone is about as profound as it gets. Sometimes this intensity can be scary. You must constantly consider the other person and make compromises, all the while being extremely vulnerable to them. It often means choosing them over time spent with others, over things that don’t benefit you as a couple and even over your needs should their needs be greater. In a healthy relationship this “giving behavior” is equally reciprocated, creating a positive partnership.
Should one of you feel restless due to commitment issues, you need to take a better look at the bigger picture. If either of you still wonders if there could be “another” out there better suited to you, or if you have overwhelming fears of being vulnerable, you need to talk things over. Either you can work through those fears and doubts, or you need to move on.
A relationship must grow and develop in order to thrive. If things have become stagnant, one or both of you may start to feel restless. You need to change things up and move forward if you want to stay together. This could mean moving in together, getting married and even having children (if that’s a goal you both share). It could mean improving yourselves as individuals too.
Feelings of restlessness need to be addressed, rather than ignored. Get on the same page sooner, rather than later. The future of your relationship depends on it!